The Story of When the Cheese met the Onion
In the tranquil vicinity of Ten Acre during the Dark Ages, when entertainment was a luxury and bathing depended largely on the weather, people had to make their own fun with whatever was around them. It had become an accepted fact that if you threw something round down a hill, it kept moving! There were many activities based on this principle with varying results, but none more ingenious than ‘onion rolling’, as it incorporated the rolled object and the prize in one.
The arrival of the Creme family at Ten Acre had been hailed with excitement as they possessed great cheese expertise, although they caused controversy shortly after they had settled in by interfering with the ancient onion rolling tradition that had developed in the area. In the bright summer of '04, everything was ready to go for the annual onion roll. The prize that year was an enormous specimen known as 'The Conker', grown by local farmer 'Weeping' Tom Scallion. The rules were simple; onion goes down the hill, contestants chase after it, the winner gets to keep the onion. It was a simple yet entertaining competition loved by villagers for generations. The Mayor of Ten Acre, Mr Sebastian Salt, had the honour of launching the onion that year. The contestants were all lined up ready to go at the top of Ridge Hill, the referee was preparing to blow the starting horn once the onion had passed the marker - all seemed normal. The horn sounded, the prized onion launched and the runners were in full tumble, when suddenly a large, bright yellow disc seemed to explode from the undergrowth, devastating vegetation in its path as it careened down the hill. The gathered crowd crooned at the spectacle; their pitch intensifying when a chance deflection off a projecting stone launched it into the air over the heads of the runners and sent it smashing into 'The Conker'. Scientific inevitability prevailed and the invasive disc hurtled on at a tremendous pace.
The identity of the offending article was ultimately revealed when the yellow wheel smashed into the Old Oak at the foot of Ridge Hill just before the river, showering the open-mouthed villagers in an tasty explosion of onion-infused cheese. In the end there were no hard feelings, and this is how the cheese met the onion... travelling helter-skelter down Ridge Hill, in the normally peaceful village of Ten Acre.
©Yumsh Snacks Ltd
Potatoes, Sunflower Oil, Cheese & Onion Flavouring (Onion Powder, Rice Flour, Salt, Yeast Powder, Dextrose, Yeast Extract, Garlic Powder, Citric Acid E330 , Natural Onion Flavouring.
- Mmmm Review by Jonathan
Like cheese and onion crisps pre Vegan days (Posted on 04/01/2016)